The other day I decided to soak my tired snow-shoveling muscles (yes, there’s already snow here) in a nice hot bath before bed. Settling in to the water, I was thinking about how Adamus said a while back that “I will celebrate with you, I will dance and drink with you till the early morning hours, when you stop thinking.” “So,” I said out loud, “Are you gonna show up tonight?” The reply was immediate. “If you actually stop thinking, I will most definitely show myself to you,” he said. “But you won’t recognize me.” Oh really…?
So… how do I stop thinking? My mind went round with that for a bit, having as much fun as a dog trying to catch its tail. “Get into your body,” I told myself. So I closed my eyes, focused on my body, the warm water, and breathing deeply. My mind began to lose focus and wander off on some rambling exploration I don’t quite remember.
Sitting
here looking out my office window at all the aspen,
pine and spruce trees that are close enough to touch,
I remember that without them I could not be here, for
they create the oxygen that sustains me. They breathe
so that I can breathe. In fact, I am breathing the oxygen
created by trees thousands of miles away from me and
I am grateful for the life they make possible.
Do
you know that you are breathing life for those
who follow? You are creating the essence – the
New Energy oxygen – for their awakening,
simply by going about your life, being who you are,
and breathing for yourself. Those trees on the other
side of the world don’t know I’m breathing
the air they have enriched. They are simply being trees,
standing tall, swaying with the wind, experiencing the
weather, reaching deep into the earth, and offering
their presence.
Each of us have our own unique story of how we found
our way to the Crimson Circle, how our heart made it
back to this “family of choice.” Some of
us have been here from the very beginning; some of us
only months, weeks or even days. For myself, I discovered
Tobias (by name) in the spring of 2002 when someone
sent a channel to my brother and he passed it along
to me. I’ll never forget how my heart opened when
I read it. I had explored a lot of metaphysical things
by then but that channel from Tobias went beyond anything
else I’d ever read. It wasn’t about the
information so much as the feeling of “I know
this, this is HOME!”
As I devoured all the channels and came to know Tobias
more clearly and consciously over the next few months,
I recognized how his energy had been so near throughout
my entire life. In fact, he has been there with every
single one of us as we have found our way through this
amazing lifetime – and that’s part of what
makes this year, this moment, so deeply poignant.
It’s
summer, at least in my part of the world, the weather
is warm, the sun is shining and there is an air of rest
and relaxation around town. People are busy, going about
their lives and their jobs, but there is something about
the warm summer days that brings a few more smiles and
cheerful greetings.
Today
I finished editing the latest Crimson Circle youtube
video. Being very focused on the technical details and
getting everything just so, I didn’t really allow
myself to sink into the energy and feeling of it. But
then, only minutes after it was completed, I realized
that the energy packed into the message had been sort
of piling up. And in that moment it washed over and
filled me like a deep tidal wave. I just sat there with
a silly grin on my face, feeling the reality that I
call “being Shaumbra.” I could truly feel
the impact that we are having on all of consciousness
through the energy we are helping to create and bring
in.
Kuthumi told us a joke a while back: “A funny
thing happened on the way to ascension. I lost everything!”
Well, I’ve heard some pretty funny things from
him but I didn’t hear anyone laughing
at that joke. What’s the point of some
grand ascension if you have to lose everything that’s
precious to you? If every hello becomes goodbye, and
every treasure becomes baggage?
So many Shaumbra have lost so much – friends,
lovers, children, possessions, homes, jobs – in
fact just about everything that had previously defined
them. I can personally attest that “losing everything”
pretty much does mean everything. And yet,
along the way I have also lost a few things I didn’t
expect – doubt, hesitation, lack, old wounds,
energy entanglements with others, fears within myself,
confusion, concern about other’s opinions –
and so many other limitations I’d been holding
onto.
During the last Shoud when Tobias was talking about
seduction, I kept hearing and feeling the word “suction,”
not only because they sound very similar but also because
seduction has so much to do with the way things can
pull and suck at you. When you move forward, the past
can pull at you – whether a moment ago, a relationship
ago, or a lifetime ago. When you expand and grow, the
old limitations and ways of being can tend to pull you
back into familiar patterns.
This is actually a natural effect. When you move your
hand through water it causes turbulence and a type of
suction as the water tries to fill in where the movement
has disrupted its former equilibrium. By the same principle,
consciousness movement and expansion creates the natural
effect of suction/seduction as the energies around us
seek to go back to their old balance.
Have you met someone who is familiar from long ago and
found yourself falling into – or trying to recreate
– the same old patterns? It’s not karma,
it’s the seduction of “the good old days,”
the inertia of the status quo, the resistance to change.
Even the drama and pain of the world is so ingrained
within itself that it seeks to keep its current state
of imbalance rather than change and expand.
Dear Shaumbra, one of the most exciting and potentially
far-reaching creations that the Crimson Circle has ever
manifested is the Call to Awaken, a co-channeling by
Tobias and the amazing musicians from our Quantum Leap
Celebration, Amir and Gerhard. If you haven’t
heard it yet, you are in for an incredible experience.
As the name suggests, it is a message of awakening,
first for Shaumbra and then for the world. It is a call
that finds its way into the soul and triggers something
that has been asleep for a very long time.
And yet… are YOU really ready to wake up? Do you
jump out of bed and race into your day, or do you linger
for a while, wishing for a few more minutes of sleep?
When it’s time to wake up, how many of us would
much rather crawl back under the covers, pull the blankets
over our head and sleep for “just a little longer”?
Pondering
this edition of Shaumbra Heartbeat, I found lots of
seemingly disconnected ideas wandering though my mind.
And every time I’d try to find the words it was
like trying to grab onto a dream. Poof – gone!
Aha, to write about the heart of Shaumbra one must dive
in and feel the heart of Shaumbra! And here
you are, around the world…
…gazing out on a snowy winter day… watching
angel dust drifting through the trees… listening
with every sense to the white silence that Gaia has
wrapped around herself… and in that moment knowing
the world is perfect.
…trembling at the choice that’s just been
made, for it means a chapter in the book of your life
is drawing to a close. A goodbye is forming that you
never thought you’d say. And yet, through your
determination and your tears, you see the new potentials
already pressing in.
…seeing a baby looking at you over dad’s
shoulder and whispering, heart to heart, “Welcome,
you’re going to love it here, just don’t
forget who you are!”
...hearing your name called out while you’re teetering
on the edge of waking up, and knowing it’s YOU
calling you home.
…getting surprised by a sudden glow of sunlight,
stopping to really FEEL it for a moment, and suddenly
feeling yourself expand beyond all boundaries of time
and space. And you can’t explain the silly grin
on your face the rest of the day.
…working up the nerve to say “I love you,”
out loud, to yourself… and then feeling the overwhelming
love that washes over you and makes you cry.
